Shock! Herald Paparazzi Catch Cardie Mahoney at Crayonista Christmas Party

Black Christmas Special from Pat the Rat.

In a truly shocking development that so clearly illustrates the lack of moral compass in the English speaking world it is going to make me vote Republican for the first time ever, a Herald Paparazzo infiltrated the Crayonista "Christmas Party" -- and I put this in scare quotes because Black Winter Solstice Debauch is more like it -- and caught pictures of the Crayonistas frolicking with Second Life uber-escort Cardie Mahoney. In an even *more* shocking development, Herald founder and contributing editor Urizenus Sklar was not even invited! Well obviously, they didn't want him stealing their women, but that doesn't make it right, now does it? More pictures of the sordid affair available here. What. You didn't know Neville Hobson worked for us? Dahling, he was the first paparazzo in Second Life!

Comments

[Artemis Fate]

I simply do not understand this obsession with "uber-escort" Cardie Mahoney like she's some kind of SL celebrity. What happened, did she tickle your xcite bits for a 5 spot Herald exclusive?

[dest]

her appearance seriously dips into the Uncanny Valley

[SunShine Kukulcan]

Hang on just a SL minute: This Cardie is selling MEMBERSHIPS to her website?? OMFG! Fiddly bits tickling not withstanding, just exactly WHAT is her attraction to the SL hordes?? BAH!

SunShine

[Gideon Television]

Cardie once said to me "Men will pay to see fake silicon breasts, why not real pixel ones?" And when you put it like that...

[urizenus]

What Gideon said, but more, the internet is full of clubs membership to which provide you access to photoshopped digital images of plastic surgeried and made up and posed "stars" like Jenna and Tera and a host of others. the difference between that and a club where you see images generated by posing personal avatars in SL is not really so far apart.

[Artemis Fate]

"What Gideon said, but more, the internet is full of clubs membership to which provide you access to photoshopped digital images of plastic surgeried and made up and posed "stars" like Jenna and Tera and a host of others. the difference between that and a club where you see images generated by posing personal avatars in SL is not really so far apart."

Well I understand why she puts up the website, though it should be noted that real life beauty (combined with nudity) is still rare without a price tag, whereas Second Life beauty, is extremely common, and it's not hard to find them nude either. The porn industry runs off of that rareness of material that Second Life doesn't have.

Anyways, that doesn't answer the original question. Why do you keep posting articles about her? Why am I supposed to care about some hooker, who i'm continually told over and over that she's "super-model" or "infamous" or "uber-escort", as if you or her are trying to craft her own fame? I mean, this is like the 5th article on her where she's treated like Angelina Jolie where people are intensely interested in what she had for dinner and what shoes she was wearing while doing it.

The difference is, as far as i've seen with comments, no one gives a damn.

[Cardie Mahoney]

I'll give a demure smile at the article - but on the comments...

Artemis: I'm a bit more than a five spot, m'dear.

SunShine: Everyone has a kink, and if I reach that for some, who am I to argue? Isn't that what us professionals are all about?

Gideon: You owe me a salsa. I can't think why, I'll think up some reason soon

[urizenus]

What can I say Artemis, she has that elusive X-factor that we in the virtual news industry crave.

But you missed the point about the article. It wasn't about the famous uber-escort. No indeed, this was about the fact that she was spotted at the Crayonista Christmas party, and

We.

Are.

Shocked!!!!!

[SunShine Kukulcan]

At the risk of this turning into a virtual cat-fight, couple of comments/questions?

Whom are you calling a professional?

On that same note, what is it EXACTLY that qualifies you as a professional? Kink?

Lastly, it seems anyone can get an invite to a Crayon event..even I!

SunShine

[Cardie Mahoney]

Sunshine: Professional as in "the oldest profession in the world" professional. Not a slur on you or any other commenters here, just one of those fun colloquialisms that I use. At some point I'll list the more colourful on my site collected from other writers around the web. And of course, I can earn money from 'personal' appearances :-)

Divo: Nothing coming from me, m'dear! I'll trust your Flickr account will be discrete.

[urizenus]

I believe 'professional' means "gets paid".

In the words of the TSO cyberprostitute Evangeline:

"Don't get broke off for free."

[TheDiva]

Uhh-humm.... Excuse me for a moment, but I believe the real scandal is that you failed to mention the fact that SL's Hottest Reality-TV couple (Gideon Television, Superstar & TheDiva Rockin, Podstar) were also in attendance.
Clearly your mole was suffering the effects of too much virtual rum in his virtual eggnog.

Humfff.

[Urizenus]

TheDiva and Gideon are so last week.

[Jane Doe]

Hello everyone, Time for some SL drama for your enjoyment. I dated "Cardie Mahoney" in real life. About a week ago HE broke up with me to date a friend of mine (Merry Christmas to me). I decided that this should be my revenge. When I saw this story I figured this is too good of an opprotunity to pass up. Cardie is a guy, his name is [elided by editor] and goes to [elide by editor]. He is 17 and is a real prick. He is as full of himself in RL as he is in SL. The whole idea of being a whore in SL was started as a joke to play on a "friend" of his and it has growen to this silly supermodle sham. I have already told his "friend" and now i am telling the world.... [name elided] you are a real jerk and i hope you get VD from that bitch!! You should have never crossed me asshole!!!

[Inigo Chamerberlin]

Six packs, buckets of popcorn and comfy chairs time folks :-)

[Gideon Television]

You mean she...? You mean, when I...? And then she..? But? If...?

Well, thank goodness all those other escorts I use regularly are women, that's all i can say.

What's that? They're...? NOOOOOOOOOO!

[Flux Stardust]

Will Urizenus be eliding his post to say "Y factor" instead of "X factor"?

Enquiring minds want to know!

[Spankubux]

Cardie, I'm sorry, but you are not a member of the "oldest profession in the world."

First of all, that honorific belongs to gravediggers or perhaps shamans (and in some cultures the two likely coincide). And secondly, what you do isn't prostitution. What you do is produce animated pornography.

Avatars are not bodies. They do not eat. They do not sleep. They do not shit, and they do not fuck.

They simply look a certain way at a certain time. Sometimes while a sound file is being looped. As such, avatar "sex" is pr0n, pure and simple.

Unless you are offering some other services of which we are not aware.

[Artemis Fate]

"It wasn't about the famous uber-escort. No indeed, this was about the fact that she was spotted at the Crayonista Christmas party"

I also see, in this picture alone:

Byron Curtis
Asphasia Corleone
Dallas Dibou
Tiny Poultry
Divo Dapto
Lynette Radio
Kim Chihuly

At the Crayonista christmas party, yet for an article that isn't about her, Cardie Mahoney has both her name in the title, and her nametag circled in the picture, that's queer don't you think with such a large list of contenders at that particular party.

Face it, you ran out of money to pay for hookers to lick your prim balls so you started paying them in exclusive herald articles.

[urizenus]

omg Art, are you telling me all those other people are cyberho's too? Yikes! Now *there* is a scoop.

[Sadako Shikami]

greetings! just a cyberho popping in to say hi, since SL is down right now. i agree that SL sex is pure pr0n - except for the girls with webcams.

my co-worker Cardie's site inspired me to try my own site! although i don't sell memberships as much as i'd like, i have fun running around being naked in as many public places as possible. i'm surprised the Herald hasn't caught on yet. i have the big box of 120 crayons ... does that get me anything?